Wed Your Daughter Well
We already said adieu to winters and now, since the weather is pretty pleasant, it’s raining ‘marriages’ in my part of the country. As I always say, ‘Marriage’ here doesn’t mean just the union of two people but a lot of razzmatazz, ranging from tons of shopping, recurring visits to beauty salons and boutiques, bookings of Palaces, arrangements of delicious food, fancy decorations, pricey gifts, hip and happening DJ, and what not. ‘It’s a once-in-life-time event’ and people don’t leave any penny unspent (Yes I am talking about middle class people). Oh and did I forget to mention the alcohol! The major chunk of budget goes here, and why not, after-all this is what will remains the ‘talk-of-the-town’ for quite some time, probably until the next extravaganza ;).
This is the common way to express happiness here; ‘if you have it, you got to show it!’
Recently, I attended one such big fat Indian wedding. The entire setting was quite royal (nothing middle class). Everything was immense; the number of food stalls was such that you forgot the counting after a while; your tongue could get tired of tasting but the variety of snacks and sweets won’t exhaust. Most of the North Indian weddings follow suit. It’s actually a race to be the best displayer.
This trend, it keeps upgrading from time to time and people find different innovative ways of displaying their mirth and worth. Such weddings leave you enthralled for many days and the euphoria only goes after some reality check.
The parents who spend so much money for this ‘one day charm’, do they have any idea what the future would bring? Everyone hopes for good which is nice, and I too believe in that ‘living happily ever after’ thing. But sometimes we meet people who force us to change our mindset.
Today I met a girl of hardly 25 years, with a badly bruised face, swollen eyes and totally blank emotions. She is done with her marriage. Reason, her husband…he terribly abuses her, physically as well as mentally. The pain she was in made even a stranger like me, ache for her.
When you meet such people, you ought to question the exhibition of pseudo-joys that are displayed around; you actually face the ugly side of humanity; the cheapness that still resides in society; the low standards of people; the absurd thinking that wives are the puppets in the hands of husbands; the mentality that once married, a girl becomes the property of the husband; the evil of expecting (actually demanding) favours from girl’s family; a greed that is impossible to quench. And what does it take to make you believe this ugly side of life…A girl who has lost faith in human and humanity itself. And surely there are more like her.
The worst part is, not many parents in the middle class families here show the heart to call their suffering daughters back. First they spoil her life by marrying her early because they can’t let a ‘good proposal’ slip from hands, and when the decision turns out to be erroneous, they find it difficult to admit. And even if they do so, there’s always a tendency of making unjust settlements. “What the society will say”…is the most fearsome question ahead them!
Wedding a daughter is considered a big responsibility for parents here, but do they know what the bigger one is?
Deep down they know. Then why just prevent to be blind. Trusting their decision, a daughter nods to hold the hand of a stranger. Somebody tell them, not to be in so hurry. Give her some time. Atleast make her strong enough to support herself without depending on anyone. And when she is ready…
help her find a suitable ‘partner’ not an ‘owner’.
Wed Her Well.
Picture Credits: Google
Posted on February 27, 2017, in Empowerment and tagged #Afterglow, #Evilsinsociety, #GirlPower, #MoneyShow, #Royalwedding, #Suitablematch, #Weddingplanner, #Womenempowerment, India, marriage. Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.