Kids are a necessary evil. If you don’t have them your life is empty; if you have them, you feel blessed but are definitely going to feel short of space soon ;).
Bringing up children is more of a challenge than blessing, especially when your little one goes to school. Mother has to start school all over again and with a totally different perspective. My journey has just begun but I am all set. I belong to that breed of moms who are all armoured for every kind of situation; who don’t fear facing challenges! Win or loss…doesn’t matter.
Folks, my experiments with motherhood are going well. I am often showered with plenty of delightful moments fortified with unforeseen surprises (as bonus), and it seems unfair if I don’t share them with you.
My ‘GlowinGal’ is a piece in millions (I know every parent thinks the same 😉 ). She lives on extremes, sometimes behaving so sensible, leaving me aghast, and at times, she doesn’t miss any chance to make my blood boil; she keeps me on my toes. BUT I want to admit, my life incredibly INTERESTING and way too EXCITING, because of her ! 🙂
I am not a huge sports fan but last month when the entire world was hoping and fighting for medals in RIO, I too occasionally froze in front of the TV. Seeing the enthusiasm and the sportsmanship of the participants, I thought we should also try and focus on one sport for our daughter. Who knows, One day she might win a Medal for our country! 😉 (I just thought…remember.), and the thought passed with a new task waiting in the list.
Yesterday, when I came back home, she cheerfully welcomed me glowing golden with a Medal around her neck. I was like, “what is this for?”
“Ma, I got first position in Summer Holiday Homework!” She chirped.
“Really!” (I thought, I wasn’t as good as the other mothers. Have I outperformed them?)
I guess YES, and here is the proof. 😉
Enough kidding! I am in competition with no one. I just want to be good enough. Her little achievements make me more confident every-time, and I feel like going a step further…But I also know that I am a human and possibly not a PERFECT one.
But I am doing great and I am happy with that! 🙂
Mother is the most precious gift given to us by Almighty God.
A relation─so pure; so unselfish, and look at us! We hardly realise her true worth! The more ‘intellectual’ we become, the more we take her for granted. When was the last time that you hold your mother’s hand, looked straight in her eyes and asked, “How are you Ma?” I know she is yearning for this very little gesture from your side but I also know that you don’t have time for such a thing. You are always full of excuses, “Oh this is just show off. I love her and she knows it.” I agree she knows but doesn’t she deserve to be reassured that you acknowledge the selfless love that she showered on you all her life, more when you were voiceless and helpless?
In the past, I myself have many times said it to my mom, “You won’t understand Ma!” and now I understand that ‘look of her’ in the reaction. Yes, now I understand, because I am a mother. Motherhood has made me understand many things to which I never paid heed ever. I understand now why my Mom always smiled when my eyes met hers. Why she used to panic whenever I complained of recurring headaches in childhood. She would use myriad methods to heal her ailing daughter. She is a strong believer in things beyond science, and amazingly her logic always proved right.
I understand now why she walked beside papa−to make every effort to make our life comfortable. I understand why she scolded me at places− so that I learn to differentiate right from wrong. I also understand why she overlooked many of my silly mistakes − to save me from the fury of others.
Did she ever think of getting her share of love in return?
I don’t know but from my own little experience as mother, all I have learned is that a mother goes through a lot for her children, and she does everything not due to some ‘motive’ but purely out of love. Its not-at-all justified if we just forget to tell her that we are not even thankful to have her.
Miles apart, I miss that sleeping by mommy’s side especially on a sunny winter afternoon; it felt like the safest place in the world. Now I am grown up and busy in my own struggles of life.
It is sad that a girl is supposed to leave her house and the relations which gave meaning to her life, but should physical distance be a barrier for returning love to a mother whose love has shaped our lives?
Let’s make our beautiful mothers feel special and tell them that they are precious and irreplaceable…No matter what!
It was a mother-daughter story-session and ‘Glowingal’ was gladly telling me the story of a Crow who was very unhappy with his colour. When he saw a Swan swimming in a serene lake, displaying his glorious white plumage, the crow got desperate. Thinking, it might be the result of a daily swim in the lake, he too started taking bath and would spend hours rubbing his body against the mud. Neither his colour nor his determination faded, instead, he felt sick and died.
She made sure I hear the Moral , “You can change habits not the Nature.”
I was thinking, How unfair of Nature!
Then another day, we received a fruit basket from some relatives with delicious apples and pears in it. The fruits were disappearing fast from the fridge, especially the pears. Soon, I caught ‘GlowinGal’ red handed and she was like, “Ma, I love apples!”
“But this is pear, my dear!”
“No! Pear is green. This is red apple.”
“But apples do have green colour and Look at the shape and the taste!”
“No, this is apple, see!” and she munched the pear. “Apples are red and pears are green!”
It’s not easy to win from a soon-to-be four. 🙂 So seeing her grit, I yielded, “Okay! You are right; this is apple only. Pears aren’t red!”
(How do I tell her that there is something called ‘gene’ and scientists keep playing with it to make some desirable changes in things they ‘feel like’! On one hand, her story says you can’t change the Nature and on the other hand, we keep changing Nature!
Even if I am successful in convincing her that it is actually a ‘pear’, I am afraid, she’ll ask me to request the scientists to make all the Crows white! ) 😉
Do you know how difficult is it to make a kid sit and do homework during the summer vacations?
Just imagine, one evening you come back from work only to discover that ‘Glowingal’ has undone all your efforts. This is how your first response goes-
Then, you look at your better half (who proved ‘not-so-better’ this time) for an explanation.
He: She pleaded to carry the notebook to the day-care!
Me: And you allowed!
He: She didn’t listen!
Me: Come on honey! She is not even four. You could have distracted her.
He: As if it’s so easy!
Me: Easier than doing it all over again, I guess.
(Point to remember, there’s a reason, he is named Mr CoolHead) 😉
So after dissipating all the heat, I turned towards the destructive soldier.
Me: Baby, why did you carry the school Notebook there?
She: Papa gave me that! She immediately shifted all blame.
Me: No, I mean what was the need to carry it there?
She: I wanted to do the homework?
She: No. Vanshika helped me.
Me: How, by tearing all the pages? How sweet!
She: We were studying mamma! Look I have written this.
Me: Aahan…I can see that. You really did a great job. But now you’ll have to do it again, in a new copy.
She: I’ll do it mamma, in a new Copy, Yay!
And mamma melts…into a new avatar…
“It’s 46°C Outside,” wonders Mr CoolHead. “Are you sure you wanna do it?”
“More than anything,” I reply with confidence.
“What is it that you are dying to shop,” He continues.
“Are you coming?” I look in his eyes.
“I never said ‘No’. Thing is, it’s too hot out there,” He tries to clarify.
“Even this killing heat won’t scare me today,” I am so determined.
Any Mother would be.
Just imagine a situation when you are spending happy fun time with your darling daughter; Just the two of you. You suddenly feel like hearing some good admiring words (obviously in your praise). So you start the conversation:
“Love you princess. Do you love mamma?” (I know that’s stupid thing to ask, but I do ask her many a times 😉 ).
“Yes,” She nodded her head cutely.
“How much?” Mamma wanted more.
“Poora,” She spread he arms to the max.
“Oh my baby. Mamma also loves you, Poora, Poora!”I tried to hide her in my embrace.
“Where’s Papa?” She might have guessed the next question. So she pre-acted.
I thought of teasing her a little. Hence, I said, “He’s gone to USA.”
What? Why? And she started crying.
I made her calm. “Why do you cry darling? I am here with you.”
Very innocently she replied, “How will I catch my school bus?” Papa gives me a bath, combs my hair, packs my school bag and buys me candies?”
I felt snubbed, “I (putting my hands on my chest), your mamma, will do that honey.”
“No you can’t! You go to your work so early!” (Oh! She is right and intelligent too.)
“Ah. In that case, let’s call Papa back today only, in-fact right now. But tell me one thing, is there anything that I do for you?” I was positive.
“Yes Mamma! You help in completing my homework.” (That was relieving. Little girl has some gratitude).
“And…”I raised my eyebrows and widened my lips curiously.
“And…She looked to the roof. “That’s all.” And she started playing with her toys.
“That is all!”(I squeezed my eyebrows). “Okay. I am not losing on it. Baby, try to remember! There might be something.”
“Mamma, let me play!”She was uninterested.
“Is it so!” I have to tell her myself. I also do stuff.”I talked to myself but she is too young to understand that. But there’s no harm in talking without a voice.
[“Sweetheart, you remember that tasty, mouth-watering food you eat, Mamma prepares that; I clean the mess that you create every day, I do the dishes, and not to mention the never-ending laundry. You wear these beautiful dresses because I do a lot of thinking and shopping for you. I am the one who participates in your school competitions for parents and come out winner. I have to do a lot of brainstorming, you know. I plan all the family outings, take your pictures and treasure all your childhood memories. And, I…(pause).]
She hugged me, “I love you Ma.”
“I know you do beta.” (But inside there was a feeling of inadequacy. No doubt, I am doing everything I can but does it even matter? She doesn’t know or remember anything. Everything’s trivial. I am not doing anything ‘considerable’. All she remembers is what I am not doing!)
It’s not happening to me. I’ll have to work to be noticed. I think it’s time to add something interesting to the daily routine.
All said, now you understand why I am rushing out in that baking heat. I am going to bring some new indoor games which we three can play together and wish that next time when I again ask her the same silly question, she has something more to say. 🙂
So basically I am going inside the oven and hoping that when the timer beeps, a better mother comes out. Better… than what I was… before having this conversation.
“God can’t be present everywhere, so he made mother”
In short he shifted his responsibility of taking care of his children to Mothers. Only a mother can love her children so selflessly. From the moment a life starts budding inside her, till she breaths her last, a mother incessantly works for the well-being of her kids. She sacrifices her interests to see one smile on their face. The entire being of a human depends on how concerned a mother was while he was in the making, both inside the womb or outside in the social environment.
Just giving birth to a baby doesn’t make you a Mother; there are umpteen roles and responsibilities in the waiting. Once the good news is out, life style of a mother-to-be totally changes. She has to take great care to nurture the life inside. It’s her responsibility that her child gets right mix of every ingredient to be perfectly healthy.
It is said that a mother smiles to see you cry only once in her life i.e. at your birth. In our society there are many stigmas associated with birth, it’s our mother only who teaches us the difference of right from wrong. She protects us from the miseries of the world.
As we know that the duties and responsibilities of women are changing with time and so are the duties and responsibilities of mothers. She is no more just a wife or mother; she is more than that. She handles family along with her career. A mother has to prove herself at every step. She is doing all her usual tasks like cooking, cleaning, laundry, helping her kids with home work along with a demanding career.
Earlier working women used to take motherhood as a trouble and they delayed it as far as possible. But today’s mother knows the importance of family and knows how to balance the two. It’s not an easy job that’s why the mothers need to be admired for their untiring efforts. The world has never been a safe place for women to roam around freely but today’s mother are all set to show their tougher side by facing the adversities with a strong heart and smiling face.
In the process, they are also setting examples for their children to become able and responsible.
Three cheers for tough mothers! 🙂
My GlowinGal is getting choosy day-by-day and it’s becoming tough for ‘this’ Mum to please her taste buds.
The other night, she said, “Mom my friend brought bread and butter in her Tiffin, why don’t you ever pack something like that?
I was ready with the answer, “That’s because your ma’am told all the parents to never miss packing vegetables and fruits in the lunch box! And as you say that Ma’am is always right, I just do what she says!”
“Don’t worry about her. Tomorrow, pack me Bread and Butter only!” She demanded.
I said, “Fine. I’ll do that.”
But being a fine follower of the rules, I fulfilled her half wish and made her sandwiches. I was happy. 🙂
Her father picked her up after the school and enquired about her finishing the lunch!
She was like, “I ate only three (out of four). Listen Papa, Mamma doesn’t make good lunch! Next time you make my type of sandwich, okay!”
Hearing all this, I could only say “Really!”
Motherhood brings joys which we have either never felt before or long forgotten. My ‘GlowinGal’ has been chosen as a ‘Most Versatile Student’ in her very first year of the preschool. How do you think a Mom should feel? Yes- extremely happy and proud!
Last Sunday during the PTM, her class teacher congratulated me. Unaware, I looked puzzled. She too sustained the mystery and showed the wonderful class-work of ‘GlowinGal’. I was amazed. “Has she done it all?” I keenly observed the ‘masterpieces’ her little hands have created.
I was lost in flashbacks of how my parents would have felt on my little achievements?
The teacher’s voice brought me back to present, “the achievers will be awarded on Christmas day and there’s news! Your children have shown what they are capable of. Now it’s your turn.”
I got interested, “What do you mean?”
“There will be competitions for parents and YOU are going to participate,” She chuckled.
I realized tough time is ahead. I am totally new to this parenting of a school going kid and I am quite prone to a mess. But I have to do it to make my gal proud. Though she may not realize my efforts now; I know she will, someday! Thinking of the dazzling future, I registered to the competition of Christmas-Tree decoration.
We all have sung ‘Jingle Bells…’ since childhood but singing a rhyme is one thing and participating in a real competition!!! I mean Christmas for me always meant- a visit to the cathedral church in the town to witness all the attractive ornamentation and click some pics, or wish merry Christmas to all. I lacked right information. Therefore, this under-informed-Mom went through a lot of literature followed by selective shopping. I also utilized my creative mind and made few things at home.
I gave my best but tell you the truth, I was damn nervous; more than ever. I don’t know why?
I didn’t have a remotest idea of the size of the tree, the school would provide! It would be original or artificial, No clue?
Finally the day arrived. After a lot of hard work, tons of hangings, heaps of wrapping and loads of patience…my ‘Christmas Tree’, succeeded in winning the hearts of judges, to an extent. Yeah, I became the first runner-up. Not bad!
Now, I am relieved. At-least now my daughter must be feeling proud of me (I guess). She showed me her award and I showed her mine! We did high-five and walked out of the school hand-in-hand. 🙂
Yeah, you hear it right! This is one such day when ‘Mommy’ completely feels like a tired sloth with no energy left to utter even a word and if she looks forward for some serenity at home after a weary day at work , it’s absolutely understandable but is it affordable with a toddler around?
Most days with your kids are purely bliss but sometime everything seems so annoying that you don’t understand what’s wrong and where? The children keep testing your patience from time to time. There are times when the tots decide to stay on a howling sequence and make sure that you don’t get any air to breath.
Initially, like an ideal mother, you try to be considerate and maintain your composure. You hear all the crying and see the crocodile-tears with almost an unruffled mind but the thing doesn’t end and extends for hours together. Instead of having a rejuvenating siesta, all you do is, move the kid in-and-out, try every possible thing in your reach. You give her sheets and colours to do some drawing, give her your make-up stuff which she would adore otherwise, you try engaging her in some game on the laptop, videos on the cell-phone but nothing seems to work today.
Mommy makes the mind to take her princess for a walk in the park, only to face a new problem. The poor child is having issues with peers because of her bossy nature so she keeps coming back to you now and then, complaining and crying. As a thoughtful mother you try to help her make friends with her supposedly “friends”.
You take a breath that finally she is playing and not shedding tears. Well…don’t get mistaken; don’t even expect that you can chill-out, like that. Watch your swift bunny; she is already out of park and on the road …as if participating in a marathon? Here, it’s your turn now but you have got to be fast…sprint may be! Finally you catch her but till then she has spotted a girl-friend whose mother runs a beauty-parlor nearby and now it’s time to go visit her otherwise she is all set to do rock-and-roll, right there. Although, initially she seeks permission but slowly increases the load and volume, attempts begging, shows aggression, followed by tears and what not, until you agree to YES.
And now there you are, sitting inside the beauty-parlour where kids are trying to be friendly and you trying to be ‘normal’. Mommy-2 is busy with her own stuff and her girl is busy in showcasing fresh girlish items to your daughter. You try to close your eyes to give them the must-needed rest and Lo! Suddenly, “it’s mine!” No, it’s mine! Aaaa…Maaaaa (screams)…and before you understand what is happening two of them are already rolling on the floor… biting into each other, pinching wherever possible and pulling each other’s hairs. Since you are the knight-in-shining-armour, controlling your own temper, you separate them and show them their respective ways.
Time to go home, it’s already getting dark! But the little monster is not at all interested and it’s time that the knight show some might. You try to be firm and almost pull her forcefully home where she keeps on showing varied tantrums. She is getting-on-your-nerves now and it is really hard to keep your cool. No wonder! You grunt and you yell. It’s obviously frustrating. You have got no time to actually ‘think’, all evening. There are zillion tasks pending in the kitchen; there is laundry; class tests to be evaluated; lectures to be prepared….Your mind stops working and the frustration start budding. You only wish, “somehow, at-east right-now… Leave me alone…I don’t want to say anything or listen…I just want to have some peace and a good night sleep….”
Mom is expected to be loving, caring and giving, all the time. But how many times it is realized that she is first a ‘human’ and sometime she too runs out of fuel and needs a refill. Today she had a rough day! Does it make her less motherly? Give her a break today! Who knows, May be tomorrow, Mommy will wake up a magical wand and make everything way better than usual…!
Hope, I am not being judged here! Do share your views. I know there are ‘mothers’ much much better than me and I would sincerely love to hear from them.