Blog Archives

My Sunshine, My Rain, My Mom

Picture1

Mother is the most precious gift given to us by Almighty God.

A relation─so pure; so unselfish, and look at us! We hardly realise her true worth! The more ‘intellectual’ we become, the more we take her for granted. When was the last time that you hold your mother’s hand, looked straight in her eyes and asked, “How are you Ma?” I know she is yearning for this very little gesture from your side but I also know that you don’t have time for such a thing. You are always full of excuses, “Oh this is just show off. I love her and she knows it.” I agree she knows but doesn’t she deserve to be reassured that you acknowledge the selfless love that she showered on you all her life, more when you were voiceless and helpless?

In the past, I myself have many times said it to my mom, “You won’t understand Ma!” and now I understand that ‘look of her’ in the reaction. Yes, now I understand, because I am a mother. Motherhood has made me understand many things to which I never paid heed ever. I understand now why my Mom always smiled when my eyes met hers. Why she used to panic whenever I complained of recurring headaches in childhood. She would use myriad methods to heal her ailing daughter. She is a strong believer in things beyond science, and amazingly her logic always proved right.

I understand now why she walked beside papa−to make every effort to make our life comfortable. I understand why she scolded me at places− so that I learn to differentiate right from wrong. I also understand why she overlooked many of my silly mistakes − to save me from the fury of others.

Did she ever think of getting her share of love in return?

I don’t know but from my own little experience as mother, all I have learned is that a mother goes through a lot for her children, and she does everything not due to some ‘motive’ but purely out of love. Its not-at-all justified if we just forget to tell her that we are not even thankful to have her.

Miles apart, I miss that sleeping by mommy’s side especially on a sunny winter afternoon; it felt like the safest place in the world. Now I am grown up and busy in my own struggles of life.

It is sad that a girl is supposed to leave her house and the relations which gave meaning to her life, but should physical distance be a barrier for returning love to a mother whose love has shaped our lives?

 Let’s make our beautiful mothers feel special and tell them that they are precious and irreplaceable…No matter what!

Lost and Found

1

In this journey called life, you meet countless people but not many stay, forever. Exactly when, you start to have the best time together, something weird happens drifting them apart, for no significant reason, as if this was it! Even distant, you still try to stay in-touch or at-least informed of their well-being but inside you know the magic is fading, bit-by-bit.

You miss them tremendously in the beginning, for, there is a massive vacuum, sucking your soul all the time. You wish, you pray for things to be undone but truth is life has moved on and…there is one more truth… humans are humans…so it’s not surprising that you also find reasons to move on.

Have you ever stopped and thought, even once that have you really moved on?

We think that we have moved on but truth is bizarre. We mostly end up finding similar kind of people, we left or lost. In a crowd of myriad faces, we unknowingly/unintentionally bump into the same material in a different package. So in a way, we are always there, where it all started.

May be that’s Nature’s way of making up to the loss…

It was a Final Goodbye

On Sunday, all happy souls on Earth were celebrating the presence of GOD’s Greatest gift in their life; their mothers. And there was I, fighting immense numbness spread to the innermost point of my nerves. Two days back, my family lost its Mother, my ‘Granny’─ my ‘Amma’. She passed away silently leaving everyone in a state of disbelief. After a long period of seeing her like this (ailing), it’s difficult to swallow, her, just not being there.

Has she really gone? I am still not able to make peace with it. To assure myself, I thought of going to her room, in a hope to still see her sitting in her bent posture. I hoped as soon I would open the door, she would raise her head and I would hug her. But I was afraid. Afraid… to see a vacant room. So, I stayed far and chose to go blind on the truth.

This day was sure to come, sooner or later but the way I responded, was bizarre. I consider myself very emotional kind of person but on hearing about her demise, I could hardly cry…I wanted to but tears won’t come out of my eyes. This is scary. Why am I not able to cry aloud? Have I gone through some nervous damage or have I become a robot with no emotions left. I am totally numb, as if nothing of this sort has happened! But truth is, Granny is Gone and I am never going to see her again.

My parents say that soul is immortal and only her body has died. They believe that Amma is still around; she is watching us all through, at least for ten days after leaving the body, her soul will keep wandering around her family and belongings till all the rituals are done to make her after-life journey as comfortable as possible. Then all her past ties will break and she will be free to leave us, for good.

I don’t know, how true is that but while leaving home, I felt a strange emptiness inside as if I have forgotten something. Making a decision to face the reality, I removed my shoes and headed to her room. Gently pushing the door, I searched the entire room. A lamp is lit in the room in her memory and is well guarded and taken care of by her grandsons; my brothers. They never let it go off. Believing she is still there and there won’t be any next time, I said, “Amma! (If you are really somewhere, in here) I could not meet you in the end. I guess it’s time to say Goodbye now. Be at peace. I pray to GOD for showering his love on you and give you a perfect place in his abode. Have a peaceful Journey.

Fare well…Amma…Fare well.

 

Nutty Gutty Parenting

 

Picture1a

I was out to attend a family function with ‘Mr CoolHead’ and My ‘GlowinGal’. Every moment was enormously joyful and memorable. I want to remember some nutty parenting moments that may bury under the layers of time and for that I trust this blog more than my own memory. Moreover Sharing brings ultimate JOY.  Even right now, I am having a big smile while putting my words on this blank page.

We all agree that children are cute and adorable but sometimes they become a big pain in the bum. How do you handle the situation? Of course, you pose like a perfectly calm parent, pretending as if nothing is bothering you! Am I right? Well, at-least that is what I tried to do.

Wearing high heels, as we neared our hilly destination, ‘GlowinGal’ was not at all willing to put her feet down. She insisted on picking up. I tried to convince but ended up loaded and stumbling here and there. Inside FUMING, outside calm as cucumber; I couldn’t afford to leave her on her own. So, a clumsy walk is all right as long as we are on track ;). (This is what I call harmonizing part of parenting act)

Amid the Bhangra beats and shaking booties, it was hard not to go with the flow. Life appeared to be nothing short of a dancing jamboree and then my eyes catch a wide open mouth and a tearful face of the apple of my eye. DJ was so loud, but I could read the message loud and clear…it’s time for an exit.

After much negotiation both of us came to an agreement…I could dance as long as she was in my arms! And that was no way, a good News! (This is what I call the huffing part of parenting act). However, Mr Coolhead is always there for a rescue with his icy cool temper.

All the dance maniacs were catching their breath for a moment. Out of nowhere, my princess comes and empties a full glass of water over the head of my nephew. Ouch! He is young and obviously had every reason to be mad. Before he reacts, I took a deep breath and patted his shoulder, “It happens buddy; be cool. Now that your hair are wet, let’s go for a fresh hairdo.” Poor Boy; He followed my words. (This is what I call ‘being Cool’ part of parenting act).

In a traditional setting, people were being distributed food in a very organized manner. A person would move with a bowl in his hand, and served to all. I was very careful not to waste any food, so every time I instructed him to give her a little. She amazed me by adapting to this mode of eating. In his own flow, the distributor served her a sweet dish which she doesn’t know the flavour of! There she was, yelling amid hundreds of people. I knew it was the time for a tantrum.

Kids have typical ways to express their disagreement. She again emptied her water glass in the plate, and I again took a deep breath, and chanted inside…I-G-N-O-R-E. Yes, I ignored as if nothing happened, picked up the water flooded plate, and disappeared from the scene… (and this is what I call the energy saving part of parenting act).

According to me, ‘NOT TO FRET’ is the most important part of intelligent parenting.

Well, in that case, I did a great Job. Didn’t I?